Past Winners

Teacher: Are you good in history?

Little Johnny: Yes and no.

Teacher: What does that mean?

Little Johnny: Yes, I’m no good in history.

A housewife with three young children was getting dinner ready when the phone rang. The six-year-old picked it up and said, "Hi, Daddy!" and she began telling him about her day.

She then passed the phone to her brother and sister as was the custom whenever Daddy called from work.

When it was finally the wife's turn to talk she took the receiver and said, "Hi, honey."

"Thank goodness, lady," the voice on the other end replied. "I just called to tell you that the wallpaper you ordered is here!"

A friend of mine told her husband they had a Catholic bird in their yard.

"A what? How do you know it's a Catholic bird?"

"Because it's a Cardinal."

Only in America ......

Drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.