Past Winners

Why is girlfriend one word but best friend is two words?

Because your best friend gives you space when you need it.

“Nice dog. What’s its name?” I asked my friend’s 10-year-old son.

“Bob,” he said.

“And your cat?”

“Bob.”

“How do you keep them straight?”

“Well one is Bob Cat and the other is Bob Barker,” the boy answered.

“Tell him your rabbit’s name,” his father suggested.

The kid smiled and said, “Dennis Hopper.

My significant other and I were discussing mistakes we have made in our relationship.

I suggested she should embrace her mistakes.

She then hugged me.

One morning my wife asked our four-year-old son, Jud, what he wanted for breakfast.

”Soup,” he said.

“Son, we don’t eat soup for breakfast. We eat soup for lunch. So what would you like for breakfast?”

“Lunch,” he replied.