Past Winners

"I don't like insect puns."

"Really? Why not?"

"I don't know, they just bug me."

An actress who suffered from an inferiority complex was complaining to her psychiatrist. "I'm a nothing!" she cried. "I can't sing. I can't remember my lines. I can't dance, I can't even act. I really don't belong in show business."

"Why don't you quit?" the doctor asked.

"I can't," moaned the actress. "I'm a Star!"

"Doctor, I think I'm a moth."

"It's not a doctor you need, it's a psychiatrist."

"I was on my way there when I saw your light on."

"I get the feeling I'm going to get my old boss back again."

"I thought your old boss died?"

"He did die... and the company's going to the same place that he did!"