Past Winners

A preacher challenged his wife and criticized her actions after finding a dress costing $250 in her bag. He said, "You know we are on an incredibly tight budget.

The wife admitted that she was wrong but explained she was tempted by the devil who followed her to the shopping mall.

The man rested a hand on the woman's shoulders and spoke softly, asking her to constantly resist the devil with the command, "Get behind me, Satan!"

The preacher's wife response was: "I did, and he said 'The dress even looks good from back here.'"

When Ruth's grandson Jordan was 5, he always told everyone he wanted to be a doctor when he grew up. One day he was running through the house and into the corner of a chair and hurt his eye. He cried for a while and kept saying, "Oh no, oh no, now I can't be a doctor when I grow up."

Ruth assured him he could still be a doctor and Jordan kept telling her he couldn't.

Finally, she asked, "Why can't you be a doctor?"

Holding one hand over his eye, Jordan said, "Because now I will have to be a pirate!"

In an effort to compete with regional microchip production, the Mayor of St. Paul, MN decided to hold an economic luncheon event.

The caterer arrived with a full stock of mini apples and mini soda.

My doctor advised me to limit red meat in my diet.

So I stopped putting ketchup on my meatloaf.