misc jokes
Favorite this joke Why was the artist the only one that could see her painting?
Because it was a pigment of her imagination.
Dear Monday,
Just saying, your friends Saturday and Sunday are just more fun.
Nothing personal.
A man was scheduled to go before a firing squad for his crimes. The evening before his execution, he was asked what he wanted for his last meal. He refused the meal completely. The next morning the man was brought before the firing squad. When asked for his last request, the man said he had none.
The General in charge of his execution asked him, ''Sir, you refused your last meal and your last request. Isn't there anything you want before you die?''
The man thought for a moment, then said, ''Music has always been an important part of my life. If I could do but one thing before I die, would you allow me to sing my favorite song from beginning to end, without interruption?''
The General thought this was a reasonable request, and ordered his men to lower their weapons and to not interrupt for the duration of the song.
The man clears his throat and begins singing, ''Ten million bottles of beer on the wall...''
A man was waiting for a bus. When the bus arrived he asked the driver, "How much for the bus?"
The the driver replied, "It's one dollar."
The man said, "Get everyone out of the bus, I'll take it!"
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