misc jokes

Three ducks, in line, are crossing the road. “The duck in the back says, “Quack, quack!”
The duck in the front says, “Hey, I’m moving as fast as I can!”

Why doesn’t psychotherapy work on men?
“They don’t have to go back to their childhood.”

What is the difference between a woman and a battery?

A battery always has a 'positive' side.

A man is complaining to a friend: “I had it all, money, a beautiful house, a nice car, a great motorcycle, the love of a beautiful woman. Then it was all gone!”
“What happened?” asks the friend.
“My wife found out!” replied the man.