Best Jokes

What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet?

'C' is his first love but 'X' marks the spot!

Josh was helping Sally, clean out the trunk of her car. Inside, he noticed a bag labeled "Emergency Repair Kit". Looking at it a little closer, he noticed a stick of dynamite inside.

Thinking that was a bit strange, he asked Sally what it was for.

She said, "It's part of my emergency repair kit."

Josh said, "I can see that, but why?"

Sally replied, "In case I have a flat and need to blow up one of my tires."

The conceited young man had been in the hospital for some time and had been extremely well looked after by the pretty young nurse.

"Nurse," said the patient, one morning. "I'm in love with you. I don't want to get well."

"Don't worry," replied the nurse cheerfully, "you won't. The doctor's in love with me too and he saw you kissing me this morning."

I asked my 91-year-old father, “Dad, what were your good old days?”

His thoughtful reply: “When I wasn’t good, and I wasn’t old.”