Latest Jokes
Favorite this joke I can please only one person per day... and today is not your day!
Tomorrow isn’t looking good either for you either.
Do not keep roasted peanuts in transparent jar, they disappear fast.
But if you keep roasted cashews in transparent jar next to peanut jar, the peanuts last longer.
However, if you add third element... let's say a nearby liquor bottle... then all will disappear in no time!
One Sunday morning, a preacher tells his congregation that in order to prepare for next week’s sermon that they should read Obadiah 2:1-2:15.
Next week comes and the preacher asks the congregation if they read the required reading from the Bible. Suddenly there’s a murmur in the congregation. No one read it, but since they didn’t want to get into trouble, they all raised their hands.
The preacher then says, It is amazing that all of you read Obadiah 2:1-2:15, because there is only ONE chapter in Obadiah. Now, today's lesson is on honesty..."
A married man left work early one Friday, but instead of going home, he spent the weekend partying with the boys. When he finally returned home on Sunday night, his wife really got on his case and stayed on it.
After a few of hours of swearing and screaming, his wife paused and pointed at him and made him an offer. “How would you like it if you didn’t see me for a couple of days?”
The husband couldn’t believe his luck, so he looked up, smiled, and said, “That would suit me just fine.”
Monday went by, and the man didn’t see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday went by and he still didn’t see her.
Come Thursday, the swelling went down a bit and he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.
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