Past Winners

A man and a woman were going at it on the sofa when the phone rang.

"Who was that?" the guy asked.

"My husband," she replied.

"Damn, I better get going then," the guy said. "Where was he when he phoned?"

"You can relax," said the woman. "He's downtown playing poker with you."

A lawyer was talking to his teenage son about his future career. “Why do you want to be a doctor instead of a lawyer?” he asked. “What’s wrong with lawyers?”

“Well, Dad,” explained the boy, “I really want to help people. And when was the last time you heard anybody stand up in a crowd and shout frantically, ‘Is there a lawyer in the house?’”

Pirate: I have moles on me back aaarrrghh.

Doc: It's ok, they're benign.

Pirate: Count again, I think there be ten!

Two windmills are in a field. One asks, "What kind of music do you like?"

The other one says, "Well, I’m a big metal fan."