Best Jokes

A cop pulls over a guy and says, "Your eyes are awfully red. Have you been drinking?"

"Gee, officer," the man replies. "Your eyes are awfully glazed -- have you been eating doughnuts?"

I was walking down the road and saw my neighbor standing on his fifth floor apartment balcony shaking a carpet.

I shouted up to him, “What’s wrong?"

He replied, "It won’t start!”