Best Jokes

What should you put on the tomb stone of a mathematician?

"He didn't count on this..."

The minister, meeting a neighbor's son after church, noticed he had a black eye. He put his hand on the boys head and says, "My boy, I pray you may never fight again. And that you will never get a black eye again."

"Thank you," the boy answered. "You may want to go home and pray for your own son too, I just gave him two of them."

Never, NEVER, NEVER make your girlfriend mad...

They can remember stuff that that hasn't even happened yet!

Why can a Cheetah not hide?

Because it's always spotted!