Best Jokes
Favorite this joke Just as I arrived home after working the night shift, my wife told me to go checkout our five-year-old son's bed. When I entered Jimmie's room, I saw that his bed had collapsed and the mattress was sitting on the floor.
"What happened?" I asked him.
He responded, "God did it."
Interesting, I thought, and went back to tell my wife. Laughing she said that when she had heard the crash, she ran into Jimmie's room, saying, "Oh God, what have you done now?"
Teacher: "Missouri is the 'Show ME' state, Florida is the 'Sunshine State'. Does any one know the motto of Washington D.C.?"
Teacher: "No one? Does anyone wish to venture a guess?"
5th grade student: "Is it the 'Plausible Deniability' state?"
A man and his wife were lying in bed the other night when he noticed she had bought a new book entitled, "What 20 Million American Women Want."
He grabbed the book out of her hands and started thumbing through the pages.
His wife was a little annoyed. "Hey, what do you think you're doing?"
He calmly replied, "I just wanted to see if they spelled my name right."
10 Christian Truths...
1. Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited-until you try to sit in their pews.
2. Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisers.
3. It is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live one.
4. The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.
5. People are funny, they want the front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church.
6. Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on your front door forever.
7. Quit griping about your church; if it was perfect, you couldn't belong.
8. The phrase that is guaranteed to wake up an audience: "And in conclusion."
9. If the church wants a better pastor, it only needs to pray for the one it has.
10. Outside of traffic, there is nothing that holds this country back as much as committees.
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