A first-grade teacher can’t believe her student isn’t excited about the Super Bowl. “It’s a huge event. Why aren’t you excited?”
“Because I’m not a football fan. My parents love basketball, so I do too,” says the student.
“Well, that’s a lousy reason,” says the teacher. “What if your parents were dumb fools? What would you be then?”
“Then I’d be a football fan.”
Jake: "I hate to see a girl standing in a bus when I am comfortable seated."
Lily: "So what do you do?"
Jake: "I close my eyes."
John: How do you get out of doing all the chores your wife wants done?
Fred: It's simple. My motto is, 'Why put off until tomorrow what you don't have to do at all.'
Sally: What is the greatest labor saving device known to man?
Wilma: I don't know.
Sally: Tomorrow.
Wilma: Tomorrow?
Sally: As in 'I will do it tomorrow.'