I once dreamed I was living in the Hilton rent-free...
Talk about having suite dreams!
A man spies a letter lying on his doormat. It says on the envelope "DO NOT BEND ".
He spends the next 2 hours trying to figure out how to pick it up.
A man is in the bathroom and his wife shouts, "Did you find the shampoo?"
He answers, "Yes, but I'm not sure what to do... it says it's for dry hair and I've just wet mine!"