A policeman is on scene at a terrible accident - body parts everywhere. He is making his notes of where the pieces are and comes across a head. He writes in his notebook: "Head on bullevard."
He then scratches out his spelling error. "Head on bouelevard." Nope, doesn't look right - scratch scratch.
"Head on boolevard..." dang it! Scratch, scratch.
He looks around and sees that no one is looking at him as he kicks the head. Back to his notepad, he writes, "Head on curb."
A man pulls up to the curb and asks the policeman, "Can I park here?"
"No, sorry." says the cop.
"What about all these other cars?"
"Well, they didn't ask."
The police officer approaches the driver, "When I saw you driving down the road, I guessed 55 at least."
The lady driver looks at the officer and replies, "You're wrong, officer, it's only my hat that makes me look that old."
A tourist asks a man in uniform, "Are you a policeman?"
"No, I am an undercover detective."
"So why are you in uniform?"
"Today is my day off."