Past Winners

What happens when someone slaps you a million times in one second?

It mega hertz.

An elderly couple decided they just spent too much time and energy complaining about all their aches and pains.

“Let’s agree to not say a word about our ailments,” suggested the wife. “We’ll talk about something else or say nothing at all.”

“Great idea!” replied the husband.

Two months later, they got a message from Alexa. “Alexa is wondering if you are both OK. For the past two months we have picked up no verbal communication in your household.”

A long time ago, while traveling in north Africa, I fell in love with the cuisine so I bought cookbook while I was in Morocco.

When I came back to the States -- that's what we experienced travelers call America -- I made some of the recipes. The one for biscuits called for fresh thyme, but I only had an old jar of dried stuff so I used it and added a tad extra water. We chefs learn to adapt.

The biscuits turned out well; as I reminisce, I liked that old thyme Moroccan roll.

Mr. Jones: My new loaded SUV isn’t worth a hill of beans.

Mr. Smith: What are you talking about?

Mr. Jones: Food prices.