Past Winners

One day a child at my four-year-old's preschool class told her classmates that she needed a 'damp towel.'

Some of the other kids thought she said a naughty word and told on her.

The teacher stepped in to explain, "If your mommy asked you to bring her a damp towel, what does she want?"

A little girl blurted out, "She means she wants that towel right now!"

Bobby: What is the difference between a lemon, an elephant, and a bag of cement?

Ray: I give up, what's the difference?

Bobby: You can squeeze a lemon, but you can't squeeze an elephant.

Ray: What about the bag of cement?

Bobby: I just threw that in to make it hard.

1. You buy a computer and a week later it is out of date and now sells for half the price you paid.

2. The concept of using real money, instead of credit or debit, to make a purchase is foreign to you.

3. Cleaning up the dining room means getting the fast food bags out of the back seat of your car.

4. You consider second-day air delivery painfully slow.

5. Your dining room table is now your flat filing cabinet.

6. You're reading this.

7. Even worse; you're going to forward it to someone else.

"Have you got anything to drink?"

“Water.”

"I meant something harder?"

“Ice.”