misc jokes
Favorite this joke Did a little mechanical work today...
I put a rear end in a recliner.
Milkman (to new hand): "Did you put water in the milk this morning?"
New hand: "Yes sir."
Milkman: "Don't you know this is wicked?"
"But you told me to mix water with the milk?"
"Yes, but I told you to put the water in first and then pour the milk into it. Then, you see, we can tell the people we never put water in our milk."
A hesitant driver, waiting for a traffic jam to clear, came to a complete stop on the freeway ramp. Traffic thinned, but the driver still waited.
Finally, a furious voice from the vehicle behind him cried, “The sign says to yield, not give up!”
Commuting to New York city a lady seated herself in the train that contained a solitary traveling salesman. After a while the salesman said, politely, "Excuse me, miss, but..."
"If you speak or annoy me, I'll pull the train cord!" snapped the lady.
Whenever he attempted to speak, the lady threatened to give the alarm. At last the train slowed up at a station and the salesman rose to his feet. "I don't care whether you like it or not," he said. "but I want that torn bag of strawberries you've been sitting on for the last 20 miles!"
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