misc jokes
Favorite this joke My face in the mirror isn’t wrinkled or drawn.
My house isn’t dirty. The cobwebs are gone.
My garden looks lovely and so does my lawn.
I think I might never put my glasses back on.
Census Taker: "How many children do you have?"
Woman: "Four."
Census Taker: "May I have their names, please?"
Woman: "Eenee, Meenee, Minee and George."
Census Taker: "Okay, that's fine. But may I ask why you named your fourth child George?"
Woman: "Because we didn't want any Moe!"
My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch.
It’s called lunch.
A defector from another country moves in to an apartment in Chicago, and his new neighbor asks what his apartment back home was like.
“Oh, it was perfect,” the defector says. “I could not complain.”
“What about your job?”
“Oh, my job was perfect. I could not complain.”
“And the food?”
“Oh, the food was perfect. I could not complain.”
“So if everything was perfect in North Korea, why did you move?”
The man says, “Here I can complain.”
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