misc jokes

A good speech needs a good beginning and a good ending...

... and they should be as close together as possible.

My poor knowledge of Greek mythology has always been my Archilles' elbow...

If I had $1 every time someone over 40 told me my generation was the problem...

Then I could afford a house in the economy they ruined!

Last year I entered a marathon. The race started and immediately I was the last of the runners. It was embarrassing.

The guy who was in front of me, second to last, was making fun of me. He said, "Hey buddy, how does it feel to be last?"

I replied, "You really want to know?"

Then I dropped out of the race.