Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble letters on the road.
I asked him, "What's the word on the street?"
I hate it when my wife gets mad at me for being lazy.
It’s not like I did anything!
My boss arrived at work in a brand-new Rolls Royce.
“Wow,” I said. “That’s an amazing car.”
He replied, “If you work hard, put all your hours in, and strive for excellence, I’ll get another one next year!”
Waiter: I see your glass is empty, would you like another one?
My Dad: Why would I want two empty glasses?