misc jokes
Favorite this joke While in international waters, a commercial fishing boat was taking on water. The Captain got on the radio, “May Day, May Day!”
In a few moments he heard a crackling response on his radio from another fishing boat, “June Day, June Day.” Then yet another fishing boat responded, “July Day, July Day.”
The First Mate said, “Captain, what do all these responses mean in international code?"
The Captain replied, “It means man the life boats.”
Two friends are talking over lunch in an outdoor patio.
"So what are you doing for summer vacation?" one asks.
The other one replies, " I want to go to Italy again, like last year."
The first asks, "Wow! You went to Italy last year?"
The other answers, "No, but I wanted to."
What is the one thing joke writers learn first?
Proper grammar is a buzz kill.
There was a case in one hospital's Intensive Care ward where patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11 a.m., regardless of their medical condition.
This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to do with the supernatural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths occurred around 11 a.m. on Sundays.
So a World-Wide team of experts was assembled to investigate the cause of the incidents. The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11 a.m., all doctors and nurses nervously wait outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books and other holy objects to ward off the evil spirits.
Just when the clock struck 11, Pookie Johnson, the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged the life support system so that he could use the vacuum cleaner.
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