Latest Jokes

It's game 7 of the NBA basketball finals and a man makes his way to his seat at center court. He sits down and notices that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone is sitting there. He responds, "No, the seat's empty."

"The first man exclaims, "What?!?! Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the NBA finals and not use it?"

The neighbor responds, "Well the seat is mine, but my wife passed away and this is the first NBA finals we haven't been together."

The first man responds," I'm sorry to hear that. Wasn't there anyone else, a friend or relative, that could've taken that seat?"

The neighbor responds, "No, they're all at the funeral."

A ten-year-old was watching TV with her Grandma.

The newscaster interrupted the program to announce the outcome of a political election.

"More on candidates at 11pm," he said.

The child exclaimed, "I didn't know they could call politicians 'morons' on national television!"

People are funny...

They spend money they don't have...

To buy things they don't need...

In order to impress people they don't like!

A couple was having a discussion about family finances.

Finally the husband exploded, "If it weren't for my money, the house wouldn't be here!"

The wife replied, "Honey, if it weren't for your money, you wouldn't be here!"