Best Jokes

At an art gallery, a woman and her 10 year old son were having a tough time choosing between two paintings. They finally chose and went with the autumn themed one.

“I see you prefer an autumn scene as opposed to a floral one,” said the gallery owner, who happened to be nearby and witnessed the mother-son interaction.

“No,” said the boy. “This painting is wider, so it’ll cover the three holes I put in the wall.”

A lady goes up to a railroad ticket window and says to the agent, "twotoDeluth."

The agent looks back at her and replies, "tweetdiddleleet, where do you want to go lady"?

What did the badger say to the bear?

Have a beary nice day, I hope it's not too grizzly!

This was a recent conversation that I had with my girlfriend’s father, who knows I do web design.

Father: I have a business idea. How hard is it to make a Facebook?

Me: Oh, that's simple, not hard at all.

Girlfriend: No, he doesn’t mean to make a Facebook profile. He means to redo ALL of Facebook.

Me: Oh. In that case, that's very hard.

Father: Oh, okay. (Pause) What are we talking then, maybe just 3 to 5 hours?