misc jokes

An anthropologist was assigned to Borneo Island, where he found a guide with a canoe to take him up the river to the remote site he where he would make his collections. At noon on the second day of travel up the river they began to hear drums.

"What are those drums?" asked the anthropologist, knowing he was in cannibal country.

The guide turned to him and said "No worry. Drums OK, but very bad when they stop."

They both went ghostly pale when the drums suddenly stopped. The guide crouched in the belly of the canoe and covered his ears.

"Do as I do! Very important!" intoned the guide with great urgency.

"Why? What does this mean?" asked the panicked anthropologist.

"Drums stop! Next come guitar solo!"

When I was a little boy, I used to be afraid of the dark...

Now as an adult, I see the electric bill and I'm afraid of the light!

Why did the two cameras decide to get together for a date?

If they clicked, they wanted to see what would develop!

A shipwrecked sailor spent several years on a deserted island. Then one morning he was thrilled to see a ship offshore and a smaller vessel pulling out toward him.

When the boat grounded on the beach, the officer in charge showed the marooned sailor a few news headlines and told him, "With the captain's compliments. He said to read through these and let us know if you still wish to be rescued."